Thursday, April 02, 2009

Harsha Bhogle's famous One liners.

1. This was in a match btw india and sa.. umpire rudi kuertzen caught on camera sporting a rare smile. harsha commented.... 

"last time rudi kuerzten smiled there was peace in west asia" 

2. This is again from the natwest trophy final..When yuvraj got out at a very crucial stage..harsha's one liner.. 

" Yuvraj singh will realize that this will be his longest walk bak to the pavillion " 

3. When Sachin once got out to a lollypop offspinner (I guess it was Michael Vaughn) in '02. 

He wonderfully said, " Oh what a shame. It was reminiscent of a soldier who survived the war when all the bullets were flying by his nose and then got run over by a bicycle in his native town ." 

4. ind vs aus 2000 icc knockout champioship played in kenya. (yuvi's debut) 

Sachin was smasing all aussie bowlers, and then he his a superb off drive off lee. 

harsha : " this innings by tendulkar has been a beautiful garden, the last shot being the most beautiful flower in it " 

5. ind vs nzl. (in nzl 2002-2003) sehwag had MANY lucky escapes. when he was dropped once again. 

harsha : " its been that kind of a day. today sehwag can walk blindfolded across a busy highway and not get runover ." 

6. Natwest Final: 

During Naser Hussain's mistimed hits/top edges on his way to his maiden hundred " Naser Hussain is trying desperately hard to find innovative ways of getting himself out" 

7. in the same match... " if you are not watching this segment of play, don't ever call yourself a cricket lover anymore. you are watching cricket of a very high order here". 

8. Here's n old one...at perth Adam Gilchrist took a blinder and he described Gilly's dive thus, " ... some of the sea-gulls flying here are going to get a complex." 

9. when tendulkar got a hundred he said 

" touch of Class & stamp of Authority " 

10. recently in india's tour of south africa...he blurted out suddenly after sreesanth's antiques with the bat and hips..." dis is the funniest thing u'll ever watch on a cricket field"...!! 

11. When Smith dropped Sachin in the 2nd Test 

Graeme Smith would be hoping that the world under his feet opens up & he would find a crevice large enough for him to slip through.... 

12. After india lost the recent test series in SA 

India lost the series because they surprised themselves by winning the 1st test . A win should never be a surprise . 

13. After Anil Kumble scored his maiden Ton...this is what our great man had to say... 

" This is the most romantic moment in Indian Cricket....." 

14. " The last time Billy gave lbw , Berlin wall was not there , there was peace in Afganistan,..................." 

15. In a match between Aus n SL , Harsha said to Ian Chappell , " I am sure you'll never become a lawyer , I understand everything you say " 

Ian Chappell had no counter for this. 

16. Harsha was hosting the ICC Awards before the T20 World Cup and he called on Jonty Rhodes to present an award. 

So as Jonty began climbing down the stairs, Harsha exclaimed, ''it's pretty unusual to see Jonty walk down the stairs, I thought he might slide down them !" 

17. when the wickets were falling in a heap in the T20 match... 

THIS SERIES IS SPONSERED BY KFC AND THE WICKETS ARE FALLING FASTER THAN THEIR (KFC's) DELIVERIES.... 

18. when Gambhr was dropped twice on consecutive deliveries, - " We should conduct a dream job in Australia & the winner will get to stand in the slip region!!!!!!" 

19. When Kumble and Ishant were batting, Hussey dropped a catch of Ishant off the bowling of Johnson and Harsha exclaimed," It's autumn in Adelaide. It's the time when leaves change their colour and they start dropping. Here, as well the catches are dropping..". 

20. In a match, dravid left a ball alone while batting. To this gavaskar, who was commenting alongside harsha was very impressed by the way he left the ball. He went on appreciating that for a minute or so. After this harsha's comment was, " Sunny, you nearly got an orgasm of happiness, didn't u!" & then both burst out into laughter! 

21. dhoni is battin with anil kumble.. dhoni calls for a tight single,n harsha has this to say," dhoni scrambles for a single n causes anil kumble n all of his 37 yrs to rush to the other end.." 

22. after shaun tait did not live up to the hype Cricket Australia created around him, ponting took him off the attack. 

harsha, in his own inimitable style: 

'shaun tait should go up to ponting and say " hello mr ponting, my name is shaun tait, and i am supposed to take 45 wickets in this test match " 

23. HB was analysing the innings of laxman...laxman made a crucial 79 in the second innings. 

HB said something like- " aussies must be feeling that wenever we are on the verge of 17th,this man(laxman) comes in between!" 

24. RP SIngh walked in but it was Laxman on strike. So the Aussies wanted him to take a single and get RP on strike... so they spread out the field completely, with only the keeper, one slip and one gully inside the 30 yard circle.. 

That's when Harsha says .. 

"now suddenly, Don Bradman is batting out there in the middle... " 

25. Seeing the flock of seagulls flying across the pitch Harsha tells Wasim Akram : " As you would say in Punjabi... kee gull hai? sea gull hai!!! " 

26. when michael clarke was caught at slip off kumble , he was still watin 4 da decision , over this harsha said, " i think he is waitin for tomorrow's newspaper to declare him out" 

27. Yuvraj hit the long six off brett lee went outside the stadium in durban 

'are there people working late in the office there....... we want the ball back' 

27. in t-20 gayle hit a monstrous six but but fell just short of the golf course outside the stadium 

harsha: " wat a poor shot just misses the golf course " 

28. " if i cannot be tendulkar then tendulkar can also not be me " 

29. the palyers told their favourite shots while coming on to bat.... 

Collingwood said "a little nurdle of the pads" and Pietersen said blocking the ball.... 

Harsha commented " the next thing they'll say is that their favourite shot is to leave the ball alone" 

30. what an introduction to India Australia semifinal: " This is a battle between unstoppable force against immovable object "